Everyone has advice when you have a baby…where they should sleep, how they should eat, when they should walk, etc. There is no shortage of opinions, a wide variety of opinions. However, there seems to be agreement on one thing…the season of raising babies is a short one. It may feel long and laborious at times, but one day everyone looks back and wonders where the time went, wishes they could stop the clock, and can’t even believe they were ever that little. Time. I’ve been given the gift of time. I’m not sure it will lengthen this season of babies for me, but it’s the most generous gift to be given at times like this.
Before Cash was born, I had a few weeks away from work to enjoy time to myself (what some people called my final moments to myself, which of course isn’t true). After Cash was born, Colin had six weeks away from work to be home with us as a new family of three. Six glorious weeks! We also made the choice to change his hours at work, which results in being together every evening, as well as Colin and Cash spending every Wednesday together, which has completely solidified their father-son relationship into something so awesome that I have no words to describe it.
For me…I had six months with Cash before needing to leave him to go to work. Up until then, Cash just went with me. This Friday will be his first time staying with someone other than Colin or myself. It’s pretty amazing. I’m very fortunate. We are very fortunate. Cash is very fortunate. And grateful.
This time next year, we will have a six month old and an eighteen month old. And up until this point next year, they will have been with us. The gift of time.
I can’t cherish every moment or embrace every second of every day, but I can move at a slower pace, figure things out without pressure, recover as I need to, make smoother transitions, help with adjustments, be present, live my values, and figure out how to find synergy in work and family.
Some people probably think I’m being a little too selfish with my time. I don’t answer calls, I’m bad at listening to voicemail, I forget to check email that isn’t work related. We keep weeding out obligations and finding ways to better spend the time we’ve been given. It’s a process. It’s important.
The impact this time has had on myself, my family, and my work is immeasurable. I am an all-around better person for it. I need to write letters of thanks to our employers, to let them know just how much these leave policies have meant to our family. More than they will ever know.
Joyful Striving 