It’s far from newsworthy that I am far from the world’s best anything. I’ve known this fact my entire life. And I’m totally fine with it. I do, however, have high standards. My high standards have gotten me far in life, especially professionally. But, I fear, they are no longer serving me well.
My high standards don’t make me a better mom or a better wife. In fact, they do the opposite. When they creep in, I enjoy things less because I’m evaluating or judging myself. It’s not constant not conscious judging. Just underlying shoulds that nag at me, and in turn make me nag other people. It’s a terrible feeling.
The craziest thing is that I don’t even know what standards I’m striving for. Where is the top? What does the best even look like? A perfectly organized color-coded calendar, daily routines, happy children, weekly date nights, perfect teaching evaluations, multiple publications per year, and lots of friends?
Regardless, I’d love to let it all go, so I can be more present and enjoy this crazy, chaotic time! My life is already pretty perfect. I, honestly, couldn’t ask for more. I just need to slow down and enjoy it!
Joyful Striving 