I’ve always been so good at protecting my time. Nowadays I’m good at protecting other people’s time and not protecting time for myself and my work. I’m not sure what’s behind it, really. Maybe I’m being people pleasing. Maybe I don’t want to depend on other people to get what I need. Maybe just a big mess of ambiguity where I want contradictory things.
The craziest part is that I’ve always been so good at this. I’ve always protected my time well, scheduled only as much as I could handle, and had good boundaries. Well, ok. Maybe not always. But since 2013. I’ve worked really hard on this!
I think my calendar is probably my best friend in this instance. That’s downplaying how complicated this issue is for me, actually. My calendar can probably help some. But I think the rest is up to me to realize that I’m gonna need to get a lot more creative with when and how I have time. And what that looks like. Like early mornings and/or late nights.
Right this second, my time looks like being scooted all the way to the edge of the bed, with one sleeping baby snuggled up next to me while a second baby is rhythmically kicking me from the inside. But I think that’s the thing…I think this counts nowadays. It’s quiet…No one else is here… I think this is me time.
Joyful Striving 