I don’t remember who wrote the post about only having 18 summers with your kids, but it crept into my thoughts today as I was at the pool with Cash, Quinn, and Gray. I looked across the pool and saw Cash standing with his friend, Caroline, by the fence talking and sharing a snack. He looked so grown up and I thought, “This is summer number 5.” How can we be almost one third of the way through all of his childhood summers? I feel like we’re just getting started. And at the same time, I’m standing beside the pool, holding Gray, who has fallen asleep in my arms. I can’t help but think, “I wish I could put him down somewhere”. But when it’s just us, he stays in my arms…or in the carrier. Quinn begs me to go to the “grown up area” or to come in where he can reach. He still needs me, wants me to play, and I’m stuck under a baby. So that’s the pool juggle. Cash being independent, Quinn under my feet, and Gray on my hip.
Next summer will look completely different, as every summer has so far. And I’ll be further along in the countdown. I’m trying to enjoy this fifth summer despite how hard it is, because I know when I look back to these sweet days, I will miss them.
Joyful Striving 